I very recently found myself doing things that I never wanted to do, and me not writing my blog for a couple of weeks is very much a part of that. Have you ever had one of those moments in which the mirror gets shined on you and you don’t like what you see, or what the compilation of the moment means about yourself? It is quite evident for those few who read my blogs that I would like to be a good person or at the very least not to be a bad one, but recently I was summing up my actions of the day and the things which I had done and found myself thinking “what a loser I have become”. It is in this summation and this mirrors reflection a person can find themselves and also lose themselves.
The first version and probably the most evident in the lives we lead is that WE ARE WHO WE VIEW OURSELVES TO BE. This is a very easy one to illustrate and to think of, for instance if you think you are the smartest person in the room you are likely to be the one who is always whining about how stupid everyone else in the room is (me). Or if fancy yourself the most attractive person in the room it is likely to show in your confidence towards those around, whereas the person who is self-conscience about how they look is often one of the least confident in the group. So in this we see when person lifts the mirror to themselves whom they see in the reflection shows in how they act towards the world. A person who becomes so focused on this aspect of themselves often comes off to others as self-centered or self-serving which is why the other two are also important.
The next version of you that holds gravity and more than most would like to admit is WE ARE WHO OTHERS PERCIEVE US AS. How many times in our lives do we do something or not do something because of how we think other will perceive those actions. Focusing on this aspect of us can in many ways tweak the first perception of who we view ourselves to be. People with an unnatural focus on this aspect on themselves tend to struggle with confidence and at times get so caught up in others perceptions that they lose track of who they are and who they want to be for themselves.
The last and most important (in my opinion) is WE ARE WHO OUR ACTIONS SHOW WE ARE. This is important like the first two but it is also the hardest for a person to judge unless they are able to take a step outside of themselves and view themselves. The way to do this is to look at your life through what the sums of your actions are while separating out what your thoughts or intents were because good intentions do not a good person make. For instance many people think about how they can better their lives or things they can do to be better people but how many actually do these things. If I for instance spent the whole day thinking about writing my book but the only actions I had for the day was I screamed and kicked the dog, yelled and spanked my kid for getting in my way, and didn’t do anything I told others I would do, my actions or actually much different than my intent however it is who I am on paper and what has been written about me for that day.
In judging yourself when you look in the mirror each one of these versions of you is very important and should be used if one really truthfully wants to “see” themselves for the first time. In some forms of thought on this subject people say we are who we want to be, but I think if everyone was exactly who they “want” or intended to be the world would be filled with only good people. That is not to say intent isn’t important because it is but often it can delude the waters on this subject. I often find myself sitting down and thinking about these different forms of myself and use it to motivate and at times celebrate who I actually am.
“For the reflection in the mirror is always at least a piece of you, but are you using but a piece of a mirror and saying it is the whole you.” CC
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