Another year has come and gone and I find myself revisiting my little nook(my blog) in which I invested so much time in the past but now needs a good dusting, and a good dusting it will get. My blog is after-all suppose to be a place where I hoard thoughts and ideas that for whatever reason I find meaningful, and I have had many of those which I haven't shared in a good amount of time so I guess its time to step back into the fray and got to it.
I've found myself as the Tracy Chapmans song "Fast Car" a song which has always held a special significance to me. I think it signifies my own plight in this life well.. The song tells a story of a young woman living in the projects whom has quit school to take care of her alcoholic father. During the song she talks of wanting to work hard to get money so she can buy a fast car and speed away from her life of poverty in the projects. Throughout the progression of the song you see her slowly begin to submit to the life in the projects, instead of breaking the cycle her family is in, she becomes a part of that cycle.
In this song the "Fast Car" become a proverbial road to nowhere. The I'll do it tomorrows and the lack of the right breaks in life becomes a killer of inertia that one through their hard work would have gained. At times I find myself (as many others) putting in the work for a successful life yet not catching the breaks needed for the pay offs one so frantically searches for. There was a study done in which brain waves were studied and they were able to determine what a person was going to do six seconds before their bodies in fact did the act. This makes me wonder what in those six seconds determines whether the person actually puts those thoughts into action as opposed to someone who doesn't. Perhaps it is a "Pavlovian" response for some after a certain amount of trying yields no results. Whatever the cause of one "burning down" their old goals and sending them to the scrapheap is of little importance for the end result is the same.
This blog for me has become an old book lost in the back of the library which the librarian keeps in hopes that someone, will someday dust it off and give it a read. That is of coarse the allure of writing to me is in that it is literally controlling ones thought patterns for a few moments and taking them on a journey to where you want to take them. The journey can both be to everywhere and nowhere at all, a journey which dirties no mans boot but yet takes the same tread of their minds. My own version of a "fast car to no where, yet somewhere nonetheless. That my friends may be clear as mud to some while a magnifying glass to others.
